Saturday, August 18, 2007

The stupid things sec 4s do

Hello mats,

I come to post regretfully at the end of a lon and eventful week. Firstly, I can no longer be called the Postman, due to an objection by one of the blog's hallowed co-founders. So, for now we shall refer to me as .

Most of this stupid week has been covered by the other posters so will skip that. However, a very unfortunate and saddening thing occurred on the "penghulu segala hari", hari jumaat. Most of our sec 3 mats, along with a rather dumb sec 4, missed their Friday prayers. I shouldn't talk about this much but I would like to remind every one that we should not waste time before Friday prayers as it is a compulsory compulsoty compulsory thing and we have no excuse to miss it

Anyway moving on, I was told by a form teacher (a teacher that forms lessons, if you don't know) to hand in my testimonial. What is a testimonial, you may ask. Well, a testimonial is a piece of paper or word document shamelessly exaggerating all the rubbish you have done in RI. Here are some excerpts from some testimonial samples i bought on the black market:

"He is effectively bilingual and is able to communicate, write and read fluently in English." Lol, who isn't?!

"While heavily committed to his academic and co-curricular pursuits, BBB (name is withheld because you all with laugh at him too much) is still able to find time to provide community service to the needy." Well what are those services? "One such project is the RI-MINDS Carnival in 2003, where he got to buddy intellectually disabled children. He was also involved in the newspaper collection to raise funds for MINDS in 2004. In 2005, he visited the Malaysian Orphanage during the Secondary 3 Gifted Education Malaysian trip."
Well, well, well, very impressive if you don't consider that more than a hundred other students did that too, and also that BBB never chose to join those events since they are compulsory for everyone in the first place.

"In 2005 OBS, he went through an 8-hour kayaking expedition in the sea despite not being able to swim." Well who didn't?

"AAA also took part in Community Involvement activities which served to help the under-privileged in the community. He would conscientiously volunteer his help in at least one major project each year." again, who doesn't?

"He never missed any training in all the four years at RI." Wahh, superman!

Well, AAHCHOO! Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit. So in order to save you all from more rubbish by the creative and shameless self-promotion shit of past sec 4s, I shall stop here.

Signing off,

Posted by Mat Raffles at 4:11 PM